8th grade boys retreat/my son has a girlfriend

A few weeks ago some friends of mine at our church found out that I lived on a farm and asked if they could bring out some 8th grade boys for a retreat. I said yes though I knew nothing. Eventually I found out that between a little tackle football, capture the flag, and archery they were planning on talking to the guys about:

  • Honor
  • Purity and how to talk to women
  • How on being a warrior
  • Courage

In hindsight this retreat was about a man’s heart and his relationship to sex. These boys are going into high school. In this sex saturated society they were going to be severely challenged if they wanted to avoid the pitfall of meaningless sex. Meaningless sex may seem exciting and forbidden for high school students but it wounds the heart in a way that it is difficult to repair. Instead of building and supporting the intimacy that is essential for a good marriage, they develop a fake intimacy. They rely on movies and television to provide them with the role model of their attempts at intimacy. Like the movie characters they remember, they try to play the part. Unlike the movies they do not have a script for their movie. Ultimately a sense of failure and fraud sets in. They do not feel like the man they envisioned when they embarked on this journey. This fake intimacy colors all future relationships with women. It is repairable but it takes time.

I mention this because something amazing happened at the retreat. The boys had just finished a rousing game of tackle football in the arena. Demonstrating great common sense I avoided participating in tackle football. Sorry! Been there! Done that! The results are always bad for a man my age. While they were playing I lit the bonfire and moved some logs around the fire to sit on. We were probably thirty minutes into the talk about purity and how to talk to a woman when it started to rain. Everyone went inside except my son. So I sat down next to him. He told me he had a girlfriend. I was shocked! Like many boys his age he seems entirely preoccupied with video games and sports. When he is around girls his age he seems wonderfully clumsy. I thought he had a great chance about being labeled a jerk for the next five years. Boy, was I wrong! He told me that there was a girl at school he liked and she liked him. He said they were very comfortable being around each other and talking about things. So we sat in the rain and he went on to explain what he liked about her. I sat and listened. When he finished we got up and joined the group inside. This was quite an amazing experience for a father. My son was invited to participate in the retreat because he lives here. He is just a 7th grader. It is possible that he will make the same mistake as others before him and succumb to the pitfall of meaningless sex. Then again maybe God has armed him with the armor to protect his heart and the desire to seek out a deeper relationship with God and women.

It feels somewhat strange that God has used me to help my son start the journey in search of his heart. Like many parents I am pretty comfortable with God using the retreat leaders in this manner but I forgot that my participation is not only necessary but required. I should know better. I just finished reading John Eldredge’s great book, Wild at Heart, just before the retreat. There is a lot of wisdom about God and the masculine heart in that book. I find myself going back to reread sections several times as I continue to try and understand my heart and others I care about. I thought I had a lot of time before I needed to apply what I had learned on my son. Boy, was I wrong! The path to understanding your heart and your son’s heart is out there. The difficulty lies in the fact that God’s plan is not the same as your plan.

Wild at Heart

Evolution Again

Here we come to an interesting question: Do the superior pass along their genes more reliably than the inferior? In primitive tribal societies do we observe that the brighter have more children than the not so bright?
Do the most fit men breed with the most fit women, or with the most sexually attractive? As a matter of daily experience, a man will go every time for the sleek, pretty, and coquettish over the big, strong, bright, and ugly. I mention this to evolutionists and they make intellectual pretzels trying to prove that the attractive and the fit are one and the same. Well, they aren't.
(5) If intelligence promotes survival, why did it appear so late? If it doesn't promote survival, why did it appear at all?

RE: Karl Marx explains the Bible

I also have written that a primary feature of modern Bible scholarship is to liberate Bible students from the Bible rather than immerse them in it.

and

Massive numbers of papers and books have been written since the mid-twentieth century attempting to show that the Jewish and Christian Scriptures are patriarchal, oppressive documents that tell less the story of humanity’s struggle with its relationship with the divine, than they are the record of proto-Marxist class and gender struggles of power, exploitation and domination.

[Via One Hand Clapping]

A fascinating piece that attempts to explain the odd political nature of the old line, western churchs. I have wondered for some time about some Bible scholars I have seen on television. I could tell they believed in something but I was pretty sure it was not the Bible that I have read. Where I have found considerable joy in being a “mere christian”, they appear to find joy in their academic pride for their position on controversial issues. It saddens me because I cannot help but believe their joy is shallow and unfulfilling. It is hard work to keep the heart open when the mind is doing all the talking. The great puzzle has been how did they develop this belief and how do they hold on.

RE: The soul

Another view point on the soul of a man though I do not think it so easy to find.

I think each of us has a kernel, under all the layers of experience and pain, that’s ageless and perfect. Some people call this a heart, the organ that pumps blood thru our bodies. Others call it a spirit, the essence of the person. Whatever you call it, it’s there, and you can easily find it.

[Via Roughly seven years ago in Scripting News]

RE: Marines Find Faith Amid the Fire

Flash Version

Great story and accompanying image sin the Los Angeles Times by Tony Perry and Rick Loomis about four Marines baptized on the battlefield in Falluja at a school from which they’ve been fighting. (all images by Rick Loomis/Los Angeles Times)

Marines

Marines
Sgt. Andrew Jones, 25, of Sullivan, Ind, is among four Marines baptized by Navy chaplain Lt. Scott Radetski in Fallujah, Iraq. “With everything that has happened here,… I thought it was a good place to be reborn,” said Jones. Echo Company is battling insurgents. Rick Loomis/Los Angeles Times


Lance Cpl Chris Hankins, 19, of Kansas City, Mo, gets a dunking in the font- boxes of MRE’s lined with plastic. Rick Loomis/Los Angeles Times

On Monday, Echo Company battled insurgents for two hours. One Marine was killed and 15 were wounded in the latest and bloodiest of numerous skirmishes.
Then four Marines “ from the battle-hardened company, part of the 2nd Battalion, 1st Regiment of the 1st Marine Division ” asked a Protestant chaplain to arrange a battlefield baptism.

“I’ve been talking to God a lot during the last two firefights,” said Lance Cpl. Chris Hankins, 19, of Kansas City, Mo. “I decided to start my life over and make it better.”

To give the occasion even greater significance, the Marines chose to have Wednesday’s baptism in the courtyard of a bullet-riddled school that they used in their fight with insurgents.

Two Marines died and several were injured in the same courtyard when a mortar round landed among their group April 12. A small memorial has been erected in the courtyard to the two: Lance Cpl. Robert Zurheide, 20, of Tucson and Lance Cpl. Brad Shuder, 21, of El Dorado Hills, Calif.

After Monday’s battle, a memorial was added in the courtyard for the Marine killed in that fight: Lance Cpl. Aaron Cole Austin, 21, of Amarillo, Texas.

Battlefield baptisms are not unusual among front-line troops, said Navy Lt. Scott Radetski, the battalion’s Protestant chaplain. So many service personnel on deployment request to be baptized that the military even has a two-page sheet on how to create a battlefield baptismal font, called the Field Immersion Baptismal Liner Instructions.

Radetski said he performed one ceremony in Kuwait when Marines were waiting to move into Iraq. Three Marines at another encampment in Fallouja also have asked to be baptized.

“When chaos shows its head,” Radetski said, “we need an anchor for our faith. You need that rock that God promises to be. I consider it an honor to fulfill their request.”

For Wednesday’s ceremony, Radetski had boxes containing MREs, or meals ready to eat, arranged to simulate a smallish bathtub. A large piece of plastic was placed inside, and water from 14 five-gallon Marine Corps cans was poured.

Sgt. Andrew Jones, 25, of Sullivan, Ind., said he had been considering getting baptized before he left for Iraq. His combat experiences convinced him that the time was right.

“With everything that has happened here, all the good friends I’ve lost, I thought it was a good place to be reborn,” Jones said.

The fight Monday, in which insurgents hurled grenades and fired rockets and machine guns at the Marines, left many of the young men of Echo Company shaken and emotionally drained.

Protestant and Roman Catholic services held in the Marine encampment hours after the battle drew heavy attendance. On Wednesday, little of the initial pain was evident.

Capt. Douglas Zembiec, commander of Echo Company, said he had tried to console his Marines while reminding them that they have to continue to do their jobs, including launching a possible assault on insurgent strongholds in the center of Fallouja.

“There’s no room for self-pity out here,” he said. “It will get you killed faster than the enemy.”

The four Marines ” Hankins; Jones; Lance Cpl. Kenneth Hayes, 22, of Redding; and Lance Cpl. Michael Fuller, 20, of Spring, Texas ” stripped to their skivvies and removed their combat boots before being dunked individually by Radetski.

Two dozen Marines stood quietly. Radetski, honoring the four Marines’ request, said the baptism was also being performed to show respect for the fallen and wounded Marines.

The elementary school shows the ravages of three weeks of fighting.

Its windows are broken, debris is strewn about, furniture is broken and books thrown to the dusty floor. Bullet holes cover all surfaces. Windows are boarded or sandbagged to hinder snipers.

Insurgents are holed up in houses a few hundred yards away, their weapons aimed at the school, hoping to kill Marines with a well-timed shot.

Still, the four Marines thought that the courtyard was the ideal spot to make a public profession of their religious belief.

“What better place to do this than here, in the middle of hell,” Fuller said. [Via The Beacon]

Huntington's Warning

I got this from Tim Curlee’s blog, The Beacon. This piece really hits home with me. I know I have thought about all of these things but Rich brings it all together and with greater meaning.

http://www.nationalreview.com/lowry/lowry200404280850.asp

Rich Lowry on Samuel Huntington’s latest book, Who Are We?. (cheers to BobbyC for the tip).

He writes that few Americans now anticipate the dissolution of the United States. But few anticipated the collapse of the Soviet Union either. Huntington warns, "The greatest surprise might be if the United States in 2025 is still the country it was in 2000 rather than a very different country (or countries) with very different conceptions of itself and its identity.

Huntington sees an America gripped in a "crisis of national identity." What is that identity? It is partly based on what Huntington calls The Creed, our belief in liberty, democracy, individual rights, etc. But The Creed has a particular source: America’s Anglo-Protestant culture, which includes "the English language; Christianity; religious commitment; English concepts of the rule of law, the responsibility of rulers, and the rights of individuals; and dissenting Protestant values of individualism, the work ethic, and the belief that humans have the ability and the duty to try to create heaven on earth, a ’city on the hill.’"

This culture forged a country where people from across the world could arrive and become rich, happy and free — if they assimilated. Huntington writes, "Throughout American history, people who were not white Anglo-Saxon Protestants have become Americans by adopting America’s Anglo-Protestant culture and political values." He notes that this is "an argument for the importance of Anglo-Protestant culture, not for the importance of Anglo-Protestant people." The continued vibrancy of this culture is crucial for the country’s future. Without it, according to Huntington, The Creed that sprung from it is in danger of collapsing — thus eliminating the two fundamental supports of America as it has been defined for centuries.

But Anglo-Protestant culture has taken a pounding during the past three decades. From multiculturalism, which rejects the idea of a dominant culture. From the assertion of group identities based on race, ethnicity and gender. And from "denationalized" elites, hostile to America’s culture and determined to weaken it in myriad ways. "These efforts by a nation’s leaders," Huntington writes, "to deconstruct the nation they governed were, quite possibly, without precedent in human history." All these forces have weakened the nation’s ability to assimilate immigrants, just as it is experiencing a massive, decades-long wave of immigration. Feeling less pressure to learn English or naturalize, the new, largely Mexican and Hispanic immigrants have been able to establish unassimilated ethnic enclaves.

Huntington worries that this dynamic could create "a country of two languages, two cultures, and two peoples," as America’s distinctive culture and The Creed atrophy. Huntington hopes for a better future — for the sake of all of us. "Americans should," he writes, "recommit themselves to the Anglo-Protestant culture, traditions, and values that for three and a half centuries have been embraced by Americans of all races, ethnicities, and religions and that have been the source of their liberty, unity, power, prosperity, and moral leadership as a force for good in the world."

A world of grief awaits Huntington. He will inevitably be misunderstood and smeared. On the contrary, only a writer of Huntington’s stature has a chance to punch through the oppressive pieties surrounding these issues and force a forthright debate of them. Huntington says he undertook his new book in the spirit of "a patriot and scholar." A courageous one.

[Via The Beacon]

Hernia operation

My wife got some bad news at the doctor's office. He says she has a hernia and they need to operate. He went on to say that after the surgery she will need to stop riding horses for two months and to expect recover about 80% of her original abdominal strength. My wife's world just crashed down on her. She rides about six horses a day for much of the week. Many of her clients rely on her ability to get up on their horses if necessary to fix problems. All of that has changed! My wife is one unhappy camper and there is nothing I can do but listen and sooth. I doubt that will be enough.